One of the underlying themes of the readings today is disappointment. I ask myself how many times I have been disappointed. I could never answer that because I have been disappointed far more times than I thought, in fact it happens frequently. It happens when my plans are interrupted, when things do not turn out the way I expect them or want them to happen. So many times I shrug these off, but there are times that I am visibly upset that ‘God wasn’t listening to me’ and things didn’t happen as I was wishing.
A quick look at Scripture and there are powerful disappointments: the Emmaus disciples were disappointed that Jesus died without fulfilling what they wanted to happen—the overthrow of Rome; Judas was disappointed that Jesus wasn’t the military potentate who would set up His kingdom and appoint Judas to a very high position. The apostles were disappointed, afraid and leaderless and had no idea what to do...their future because of Jesus’ shameless death left them as ‘wanted criminals’ by the authorities. The people who listened to Jesus and those who followed Him around were confused and totally disappointed that the hope they had was gone and forgotten and the powerful arm of Rome was in control along with the Jewish religious authorities. I wonder about all those Jesus had healed, were they stumbling with their belief now? I imagine they struggled hugely with their visions of God.
And today Peter stood up and spoke with conviction. Somehow it’s difficult to imagine that months ago he denied any knowledge of Jesus. Before this, he and the others had received forty days of instruction from Jesus. Peter shows the outcome of those instructional days with his talk today. Many of his audience had seen the miracles and signs of Jesus and listened to His preaching. Peter says that these were the initial invitations to believe in Jesus. Even though they didn’t believe at that time, it didn’t put a stop to God’s plan. Jesus death did not interfere with God’s plan; it was a major part of the plan.
Peter continues his teaching in today’s second reading in looking at the immeasurable generosity of the Father. He tells us each day that we should conduct ourselves with reverence in our down times. These times are tremendously distracting...I like to say that the devil’s voice is loud and boisterous and full of distractions. It wants me to believe that God isn’t talking because He cannot be heard; the devil’s voice is too loud and injuring. The question comes about how to slow myself down to listen to the gentle, quiet voice of God leading me and each person? This always is a difficult problem: how to listen and be aware of God. Alice Camille in Exploring the Sunday Readings helps with this; she says, “In her recent memoir, Atchison Blue, Judith Valente quotes a Benedictine sister’s formula for contemplative living: ‘Be where you are, and do what you’re doing.’ Try doing this for an hour, and see how radically different it is from the way we normally get thought the day. No more reworking or justifying the past. No more fretting about the future and planning our tomorrow to the last detail. Look at the person who’s talking to you. See the objects that are around you. Taste your food before you swallow it. Live each moment.” I have to continually tell myself that God is in each moment leading me, not distracting me. So am I allowing God to lead me? Am I allowing myself to slow down and to see God’s presence and work where I am now? Am I allowing myself to envision God’s plan?
John’s gospel shares the story of the two on the way to Emmaus and their amazing encounter with the Risen Jesus. They were extremely disappointed, even in despair that the stories of Jesus’ rising were not true. They had seen Jesus just two days earlier, why didn’t they understand what blinded them to seeing Him? And I ask what blinds me from recognizing Jesus and living God’s light?
My sabbatical teacher, Msgr. Eugene Lauer in Sunday Morning Insights shares some answers, “The disciples on the road to Emmaus were guilty of the same blunder that almost all of us make sometimes in our relationship with God. They were looking for Christ where they wanted Him to be. They wanted to see a Christ who would look exactly like their preconception of a victorious risen Savior. They were looking for a warrior-king, a triumphant general, a resplendent angel-like figure riding on the clouds of heaven. They were looking for what they wanted, not for what Christ was presenting to them in His person. They wanted the dramatic and He gave them the ordinary.” I stumble into doing this far too often. I look for the quick fix prayer. I know that God is always present but it is in His way and giving me and each person the grace to be aware of His presence and even to see His plan unfolding so that I can ask for the grace for what I need to bring His plan to fruition. So I have to constantly be aware that it’s not my way, but God’s way.
I have to be aware that each day I must go about serving God by serving the people who come into my life. Mother Theresa saw Christ in every person. She treated each of the poor, especially the sickest and most repulsive as Christ in the flesh. I am to do the same. I serve Christ when I tell others about Him and most especially where they see Christ in me. I have a long way to go each day. So I reflect on:
- How do I serve those who suffer because of injustice or
persecution?
- How do I see Christ in the people I serve?
- Do I ask for the gift of having the Scriptures come alive for
me?
- What can I do each day to make my life make a difference?
Sacred Space 2014 gives me wonderful
reflections:
“The
disciples on the road were talking about what had happened, yet they
were without insight. They were downbeat, dejected, walking away.
When they fell in step with Jesus, they found they had a listener who
brought them to hear their narrative differently.
Jesus
helped the disciples to see the pattern of His life. How has my life
been conformed to the shape of Jesus’ life?”
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